I started Vipassana in 2001. A friend mentioned it to me and that same evening I had booked myself onto a course on the internet. I was really looking forward to it because I had been looking for something for a very long time and somewhere deep inside I knew: this is it.

The course was very different from what I had expected. I thought it should be about relaxation, blanking the mind, etc. The first three days was like a concentration exercise, concentrating on the breath, calming the mind. It was hard. Not only was I not accustomed to sitting for up to 12 hours a day on a mat on the ground, I also was unable to keep thoughts from getting into my mind so I was getting upset about not being able to concentrate properly. I had pain everywhere, was unable to find any comfortable position whatsoever. There were loads of other people, whom I did not know but was unable to speak to.

On the 4th day, Vipassana Meditation was taught. Although it was quite an experience, it created something I had not expected. Lots of things came up from my past, lots of thoughts and mental pain. It was hard to face. But finally, after about 10 days of this, Metta Meditation was taught and after that we could speak. It was a bit strange and by that time I did not really feel like speaking any more. I did feel very relaxed that day.

The real interesting part came afterwards. All the stuff that had come up during the meditation seemed like something of the past, something I had lost. As if a burden had fallen from my shoulders. It felt incredibly liberating. I kept on meditating daily and became better and better at the technique and more stuff started falling of. Not always was this easy. Usually it started with periods of anguish, the pain of letting go. But when I finally let go it was just great. It made me into a much calmer and more relaxed person. Although anxiety and stress still come occasionally, it does not really matter any more that much - I can let go and relax much quicker and easier.

It has been the greatest gift anybody could have given me. I am so much more aware, relaxed and happy then I every was. I can face the world, while before I just made due. I have no stress, only the occasional storm but you always know that they will pass and they do not happen very often any more. Even the difficulties that sometimes come up are something that pass and when you come out the other side, your are a happier person. So much weight will fall off your shoulders. Just try it ... what does it matter if you try. You will not change that much if you do just one course so try and see if you like it. If you continue, you know now what can happen and what you might have to face. Then again, you might not. Not everybody is the same. Be Happy.

For many years, I suffered from anxiety depression. I tried everything, from psychoanalysis to medications but nothing really worked. Some things helped for a little while to relief my anxiety, but eventually it would always come back.

One day I was feeling particularly down, I saw a friend coming towards me on the road. We said hello and he told me about somebody he met in the pub the night before. He said she was a very happy, radiant and relaxed person. I felt a little pang of jealousy because with my anxiety depression this was exactly the opposite of myself. He said that her secret was Vipassana meditation. I had never heard of this type of meditation, but my friend gave me the website address. He said it was a great way for treating anxiety so the same evening I was on the internet and had booked for a course.

The course was great and I felt better than I had felt for many years. But coming home into the stress of everyday life was a different matter. Soon my anxiety attacks were back again. I tried meditation but as soon as I closed my eyes all the problems of the day came flooding back to me so it was impossible to meditate. After many years of meditation and many courses and moving away from my old life, my anxiety depression has disappeared, but it has taken a long time and a lot of effort. I am certain however that my anxiety will never come back. Vipassana really is an excellent anxiety depression treatment method. But it comes with a cost of time and effort, not something that many people can afford.

Luckily, if it is just anxiety depression you wish to cure, then there are other methods. I wish I had known about them back then but I did not. Vipassana is a very involved spiritual path and although it helped me well, you need to be certain that this is the path you wish to travel. It has many more benefits than just curing anxiety and stress.

There are other methods which will help cure anxiety depression effectively. One especially I found very good and it is especially designed for people with a lot of stress in their lives, which is usually the cause of anxiety depression. So rest assured, there are effective methods to control stress and get rid of anxiety depression without going the path that I have gone. But if you wish to know more about Vipassana meditation, I will be happy to share my experiences with you.